Will ignoring tantrums correct your child’s behaviour?
What we really we need to know is that satisfying his whims and fancies will not have a positive impact. The solution to the tantrum is building a deep emotional connection with your child and showing him that you are with him when he is going through an emotional chaos and that you will be right there by his side even when is at his worst.
[/et_pb_text][/et_pb_column][/et_pb_row][/et_pb_section]It is situations like these that spoil the child, and they grow to be unhappy adults because people in the real world do not respond to their disappointment the way their parents do. Shielding a child from troubles and sadness will spoil the child and walking the hard times with our children will make them feel safe and independence.In the midst of tantrum, it may be difficult to respond to him with calm, it may appear that it is just too difficult to stop a tantrum without giving into the child’s desire.
What we really we need to know is that satisfying his whims and fancies will not have a positive impact. The solution to the tantrum is building a deep emotional connection with your child and showing him that you are with him when he is going through an emotional chaos and that you will be right there by his side even when is at his worst.
[/et_pb_text][/et_pb_column][/et_pb_row][/et_pb_section]You are spoiling the child when you give into the melt down with a treat, to quickly end the tantrum. They will not know how to handle the situation when life does not turn out as they had expected.It is situations like these that spoil the child, and they grow to be unhappy adults because people in the real world do not respond to their disappointment the way their parents do. Shielding a child from troubles and sadness will spoil the child and walking the hard times with our children will make them feel safe and independence.
In the midst of tantrum, it may be difficult to respond to him with calm, it may appear that it is just too difficult to stop a tantrum without giving into the child’s desire.
What we really we need to know is that satisfying his whims and fancies will not have a positive impact. The solution to the tantrum is building a deep emotional connection with your child and showing him that you are with him when he is going through an emotional chaos and that you will be right there by his side even when is at his worst.
[/et_pb_text][/et_pb_column][/et_pb_row][/et_pb_section]We need to give him the confidence that in his moment of crisis his whims and desire will not be met but the emotional turmoil he is going through will be attended to by his parent with love and support.You are spoiling the child when you give into the melt down with a treat, to quickly end the tantrum. They will not know how to handle the situation when life does not turn out as they had expected.
It is situations like these that spoil the child, and they grow to be unhappy adults because people in the real world do not respond to their disappointment the way their parents do. Shielding a child from troubles and sadness will spoil the child and walking the hard times with our children will make them feel safe and independence.
In the midst of tantrum, it may be difficult to respond to him with calm, it may appear that it is just too difficult to stop a tantrum without giving into the child’s desire.
What we really we need to know is that satisfying his whims and fancies will not have a positive impact. The solution to the tantrum is building a deep emotional connection with your child and showing him that you are with him when he is going through an emotional chaos and that you will be right there by his side even when is at his worst.
[/et_pb_text][/et_pb_column][/et_pb_row][/et_pb_section]Responding to a child when he is throwing a tantrum in a public environment does not spoil him but not responding and neglecting his tantrum causes the child to have feelings of insecurity and anxiousness.We need to give him the confidence that in his moment of crisis his whims and desire will not be met but the emotional turmoil he is going through will be attended to by his parent with love and support.
You are spoiling the child when you give into the melt down with a treat, to quickly end the tantrum. They will not know how to handle the situation when life does not turn out as they had expected.
It is situations like these that spoil the child, and they grow to be unhappy adults because people in the real world do not respond to their disappointment the way their parents do. Shielding a child from troubles and sadness will spoil the child and walking the hard times with our children will make them feel safe and independence.
In the midst of tantrum, it may be difficult to respond to him with calm, it may appear that it is just too difficult to stop a tantrum without giving into the child’s desire.
What we really we need to know is that satisfying his whims and fancies will not have a positive impact. The solution to the tantrum is building a deep emotional connection with your child and showing him that you are with him when he is going through an emotional chaos and that you will be right there by his side even when is at his worst.
[/et_pb_text][/et_pb_column][/et_pb_row][/et_pb_section]This does not mean you remove behavioural boundaries from around your child. Children need to know that we care about what they are going through but there are rules and behavioural boundaries about how they conduct themselves at school, at a store, at home with other caregivers or when meeting other adults.Responding to a child when he is throwing a tantrum in a public environment does not spoil him but not responding and neglecting his tantrum causes the child to have feelings of insecurity and anxiousness.
We need to give him the confidence that in his moment of crisis his whims and desire will not be met but the emotional turmoil he is going through will be attended to by his parent with love and support.
You are spoiling the child when you give into the melt down with a treat, to quickly end the tantrum. They will not know how to handle the situation when life does not turn out as they had expected.
It is situations like these that spoil the child, and they grow to be unhappy adults because people in the real world do not respond to their disappointment the way their parents do. Shielding a child from troubles and sadness will spoil the child and walking the hard times with our children will make them feel safe and independence.
In the midst of tantrum, it may be difficult to respond to him with calm, it may appear that it is just too difficult to stop a tantrum without giving into the child’s desire.
What we really we need to know is that satisfying his whims and fancies will not have a positive impact. The solution to the tantrum is building a deep emotional connection with your child and showing him that you are with him when he is going through an emotional chaos and that you will be right there by his side even when is at his worst.
[/et_pb_text][/et_pb_column][/et_pb_row][/et_pb_section]Parents want the tantrum to end as soon as possible but when children are going through an emotional upheaval, they need us to connect with them and make them feel that we are with them when they are going through a hard time.This does not mean you remove behavioural boundaries from around your child. Children need to know that we care about what they are going through but there are rules and behavioural boundaries about how they conduct themselves at school, at a store, at home with other caregivers or when meeting other adults.
Responding to a child when he is throwing a tantrum in a public environment does not spoil him but not responding and neglecting his tantrum causes the child to have feelings of insecurity and anxiousness.
We need to give him the confidence that in his moment of crisis his whims and desire will not be met but the emotional turmoil he is going through will be attended to by his parent with love and support.
You are spoiling the child when you give into the melt down with a treat, to quickly end the tantrum. They will not know how to handle the situation when life does not turn out as they had expected.
It is situations like these that spoil the child, and they grow to be unhappy adults because people in the real world do not respond to their disappointment the way their parents do. Shielding a child from troubles and sadness will spoil the child and walking the hard times with our children will make them feel safe and independence.
In the midst of tantrum, it may be difficult to respond to him with calm, it may appear that it is just too difficult to stop a tantrum without giving into the child’s desire.
What we really we need to know is that satisfying his whims and fancies will not have a positive impact. The solution to the tantrum is building a deep emotional connection with your child and showing him that you are with him when he is going through an emotional chaos and that you will be right there by his side even when is at his worst.
[/et_pb_text][/et_pb_column][/et_pb_row][/et_pb_section]A child is spoiled when parents choose immediate gratification to end the tantrum by giving him stuff.Parents want the tantrum to end as soon as possible but when children are going through an emotional upheaval, they need us to connect with them and make them feel that we are with them when they are going through a hard time.
This does not mean you remove behavioural boundaries from around your child. Children need to know that we care about what they are going through but there are rules and behavioural boundaries about how they conduct themselves at school, at a store, at home with other caregivers or when meeting other adults.
Responding to a child when he is throwing a tantrum in a public environment does not spoil him but not responding and neglecting his tantrum causes the child to have feelings of insecurity and anxiousness.
We need to give him the confidence that in his moment of crisis his whims and desire will not be met but the emotional turmoil he is going through will be attended to by his parent with love and support.
You are spoiling the child when you give into the melt down with a treat, to quickly end the tantrum. They will not know how to handle the situation when life does not turn out as they had expected.
It is situations like these that spoil the child, and they grow to be unhappy adults because people in the real world do not respond to their disappointment the way their parents do. Shielding a child from troubles and sadness will spoil the child and walking the hard times with our children will make them feel safe and independence.
In the midst of tantrum, it may be difficult to respond to him with calm, it may appear that it is just too difficult to stop a tantrum without giving into the child’s desire.
What we really we need to know is that satisfying his whims and fancies will not have a positive impact. The solution to the tantrum is building a deep emotional connection with your child and showing him that you are with him when he is going through an emotional chaos and that you will be right there by his side even when is at his worst.
[/et_pb_text][/et_pb_column][/et_pb_row][/et_pb_section]Whereas when a child’s emotional needs are met through compassion without protecting him from disappointments and walking through those disappointments with them, you are teaching them how to handle themselves when life does not turn out as they had anticipated.A child is spoiled when parents choose immediate gratification to end the tantrum by giving him stuff.
Parents want the tantrum to end as soon as possible but when children are going through an emotional upheaval, they need us to connect with them and make them feel that we are with them when they are going through a hard time.
This does not mean you remove behavioural boundaries from around your child. Children need to know that we care about what they are going through but there are rules and behavioural boundaries about how they conduct themselves at school, at a store, at home with other caregivers or when meeting other adults.
Responding to a child when he is throwing a tantrum in a public environment does not spoil him but not responding and neglecting his tantrum causes the child to have feelings of insecurity and anxiousness.
We need to give him the confidence that in his moment of crisis his whims and desire will not be met but the emotional turmoil he is going through will be attended to by his parent with love and support.
You are spoiling the child when you give into the melt down with a treat, to quickly end the tantrum. They will not know how to handle the situation when life does not turn out as they had expected.
It is situations like these that spoil the child, and they grow to be unhappy adults because people in the real world do not respond to their disappointment the way their parents do. Shielding a child from troubles and sadness will spoil the child and walking the hard times with our children will make them feel safe and independence.
In the midst of tantrum, it may be difficult to respond to him with calm, it may appear that it is just too difficult to stop a tantrum without giving into the child’s desire.
What we really we need to know is that satisfying his whims and fancies will not have a positive impact. The solution to the tantrum is building a deep emotional connection with your child and showing him that you are with him when he is going through an emotional chaos and that you will be right there by his side even when is at his worst.
[/et_pb_text][/et_pb_column][/et_pb_row][/et_pb_section]A child is spoiled when his emotional needs are met by letting him have all that he fancies, this is where he gets a sense of entitlement over things and people.Whereas when a child’s emotional needs are met through compassion without protecting him from disappointments and walking through those disappointments with them, you are teaching them how to handle themselves when life does not turn out as they had anticipated.
A child is spoiled when parents choose immediate gratification to end the tantrum by giving him stuff.
Parents want the tantrum to end as soon as possible but when children are going through an emotional upheaval, they need us to connect with them and make them feel that we are with them when they are going through a hard time.
This does not mean you remove behavioural boundaries from around your child. Children need to know that we care about what they are going through but there are rules and behavioural boundaries about how they conduct themselves at school, at a store, at home with other caregivers or when meeting other adults.
Responding to a child when he is throwing a tantrum in a public environment does not spoil him but not responding and neglecting his tantrum causes the child to have feelings of insecurity and anxiousness.
We need to give him the confidence that in his moment of crisis his whims and desire will not be met but the emotional turmoil he is going through will be attended to by his parent with love and support.
You are spoiling the child when you give into the melt down with a treat, to quickly end the tantrum. They will not know how to handle the situation when life does not turn out as they had expected.
It is situations like these that spoil the child, and they grow to be unhappy adults because people in the real world do not respond to their disappointment the way their parents do. Shielding a child from troubles and sadness will spoil the child and walking the hard times with our children will make them feel safe and independence.
In the midst of tantrum, it may be difficult to respond to him with calm, it may appear that it is just too difficult to stop a tantrum without giving into the child’s desire.
What we really we need to know is that satisfying his whims and fancies will not have a positive impact. The solution to the tantrum is building a deep emotional connection with your child and showing him that you are with him when he is going through an emotional chaos and that you will be right there by his side even when is at his worst.
[/et_pb_text][/et_pb_column][/et_pb_row][/et_pb_section]If you are sheltering your child from struggles and overprotecting him from disappointments and difficulties, then you are spoiling the child. But if you are giving them what they really need that is time and attention and not rushing to protect them from disappointments of life then you are slowly building resilience and teaching them critical life lessons.A child is spoiled when his emotional needs are met by letting him have all that he fancies, this is where he gets a sense of entitlement over things and people.
Whereas when a child’s emotional needs are met through compassion without protecting him from disappointments and walking through those disappointments with them, you are teaching them how to handle themselves when life does not turn out as they had anticipated.
A child is spoiled when parents choose immediate gratification to end the tantrum by giving him stuff.
Parents want the tantrum to end as soon as possible but when children are going through an emotional upheaval, they need us to connect with them and make them feel that we are with them when they are going through a hard time.
This does not mean you remove behavioural boundaries from around your child. Children need to know that we care about what they are going through but there are rules and behavioural boundaries about how they conduct themselves at school, at a store, at home with other caregivers or when meeting other adults.
Responding to a child when he is throwing a tantrum in a public environment does not spoil him but not responding and neglecting his tantrum causes the child to have feelings of insecurity and anxiousness.
We need to give him the confidence that in his moment of crisis his whims and desire will not be met but the emotional turmoil he is going through will be attended to by his parent with love and support.
You are spoiling the child when you give into the melt down with a treat, to quickly end the tantrum. They will not know how to handle the situation when life does not turn out as they had expected.
It is situations like these that spoil the child, and they grow to be unhappy adults because people in the real world do not respond to their disappointment the way their parents do. Shielding a child from troubles and sadness will spoil the child and walking the hard times with our children will make them feel safe and independence.
In the midst of tantrum, it may be difficult to respond to him with calm, it may appear that it is just too difficult to stop a tantrum without giving into the child’s desire.
What we really we need to know is that satisfying his whims and fancies will not have a positive impact. The solution to the tantrum is building a deep emotional connection with your child and showing him that you are with him when he is going through an emotional chaos and that you will be right there by his side even when is at his worst.
[/et_pb_text][/et_pb_column][/et_pb_row][/et_pb_section]A child gets spoiled if the parents create a world around him where he gets his way about anything and everything that he fancies. A spoiled child comes to believe that the world will say “yes” to him all the time and that people around him will serve his whims and desires.If you are sheltering your child from struggles and overprotecting him from disappointments and difficulties, then you are spoiling the child. But if you are giving them what they really need that is time and attention and not rushing to protect them from disappointments of life then you are slowly building resilience and teaching them critical life lessons.
A child is spoiled when his emotional needs are met by letting him have all that he fancies, this is where he gets a sense of entitlement over things and people.
Whereas when a child’s emotional needs are met through compassion without protecting him from disappointments and walking through those disappointments with them, you are teaching them how to handle themselves when life does not turn out as they had anticipated.
A child is spoiled when parents choose immediate gratification to end the tantrum by giving him stuff.
Parents want the tantrum to end as soon as possible but when children are going through an emotional upheaval, they need us to connect with them and make them feel that we are with them when they are going through a hard time.
This does not mean you remove behavioural boundaries from around your child. Children need to know that we care about what they are going through but there are rules and behavioural boundaries about how they conduct themselves at school, at a store, at home with other caregivers or when meeting other adults.
Responding to a child when he is throwing a tantrum in a public environment does not spoil him but not responding and neglecting his tantrum causes the child to have feelings of insecurity and anxiousness.
We need to give him the confidence that in his moment of crisis his whims and desire will not be met but the emotional turmoil he is going through will be attended to by his parent with love and support.
You are spoiling the child when you give into the melt down with a treat, to quickly end the tantrum. They will not know how to handle the situation when life does not turn out as they had expected.
It is situations like these that spoil the child, and they grow to be unhappy adults because people in the real world do not respond to their disappointment the way their parents do. Shielding a child from troubles and sadness will spoil the child and walking the hard times with our children will make them feel safe and independence.
In the midst of tantrum, it may be difficult to respond to him with calm, it may appear that it is just too difficult to stop a tantrum without giving into the child’s desire.
What we really we need to know is that satisfying his whims and fancies will not have a positive impact. The solution to the tantrum is building a deep emotional connection with your child and showing him that you are with him when he is going through an emotional chaos and that you will be right there by his side even when is at his worst.
[/et_pb_text][/et_pb_column][/et_pb_row][/et_pb_section]You cannot spoil a child by giving him attention, time and love.A child gets spoiled if the parents create a world around him where he gets his way about anything and everything that he fancies. A spoiled child comes to believe that the world will say “yes” to him all the time and that people around him will serve his whims and desires.
If you are sheltering your child from struggles and overprotecting him from disappointments and difficulties, then you are spoiling the child. But if you are giving them what they really need that is time and attention and not rushing to protect them from disappointments of life then you are slowly building resilience and teaching them critical life lessons.
A child is spoiled when his emotional needs are met by letting him have all that he fancies, this is where he gets a sense of entitlement over things and people.
Whereas when a child’s emotional needs are met through compassion without protecting him from disappointments and walking through those disappointments with them, you are teaching them how to handle themselves when life does not turn out as they had anticipated.
A child is spoiled when parents choose immediate gratification to end the tantrum by giving him stuff.
Parents want the tantrum to end as soon as possible but when children are going through an emotional upheaval, they need us to connect with them and make them feel that we are with them when they are going through a hard time.
This does not mean you remove behavioural boundaries from around your child. Children need to know that we care about what they are going through but there are rules and behavioural boundaries about how they conduct themselves at school, at a store, at home with other caregivers or when meeting other adults.
Responding to a child when he is throwing a tantrum in a public environment does not spoil him but not responding and neglecting his tantrum causes the child to have feelings of insecurity and anxiousness.
We need to give him the confidence that in his moment of crisis his whims and desire will not be met but the emotional turmoil he is going through will be attended to by his parent with love and support.
You are spoiling the child when you give into the melt down with a treat, to quickly end the tantrum. They will not know how to handle the situation when life does not turn out as they had expected.
It is situations like these that spoil the child, and they grow to be unhappy adults because people in the real world do not respond to their disappointment the way their parents do. Shielding a child from troubles and sadness will spoil the child and walking the hard times with our children will make them feel safe and independence.
In the midst of tantrum, it may be difficult to respond to him with calm, it may appear that it is just too difficult to stop a tantrum without giving into the child’s desire.
What we really we need to know is that satisfying his whims and fancies will not have a positive impact. The solution to the tantrum is building a deep emotional connection with your child and showing him that you are with him when he is going through an emotional chaos and that you will be right there by his side even when is at his worst.
[/et_pb_text][/et_pb_column][/et_pb_row][/et_pb_section]1What spoils the child is unlimited indulgence into what he desires without any boundries and controls.You cannot spoil a child by giving him attention, time and love.
A child gets spoiled if the parents create a world around him where he gets his way about anything and everything that he fancies. A spoiled child comes to believe that the world will say “yes” to him all the time and that people around him will serve his whims and desires.
If you are sheltering your child from struggles and overprotecting him from disappointments and difficulties, then you are spoiling the child. But if you are giving them what they really need that is time and attention and not rushing to protect them from disappointments of life then you are slowly building resilience and teaching them critical life lessons.
A child is spoiled when his emotional needs are met by letting him have all that he fancies, this is where he gets a sense of entitlement over things and people.
Whereas when a child’s emotional needs are met through compassion without protecting him from disappointments and walking through those disappointments with them, you are teaching them how to handle themselves when life does not turn out as they had anticipated.
A child is spoiled when parents choose immediate gratification to end the tantrum by giving him stuff.
Parents want the tantrum to end as soon as possible but when children are going through an emotional upheaval, they need us to connect with them and make them feel that we are with them when they are going through a hard time.
This does not mean you remove behavioural boundaries from around your child. Children need to know that we care about what they are going through but there are rules and behavioural boundaries about how they conduct themselves at school, at a store, at home with other caregivers or when meeting other adults.
Responding to a child when he is throwing a tantrum in a public environment does not spoil him but not responding and neglecting his tantrum causes the child to have feelings of insecurity and anxiousness.
We need to give him the confidence that in his moment of crisis his whims and desire will not be met but the emotional turmoil he is going through will be attended to by his parent with love and support.
You are spoiling the child when you give into the melt down with a treat, to quickly end the tantrum. They will not know how to handle the situation when life does not turn out as they had expected.
It is situations like these that spoil the child, and they grow to be unhappy adults because people in the real world do not respond to their disappointment the way their parents do. Shielding a child from troubles and sadness will spoil the child and walking the hard times with our children will make them feel safe and independence.
In the midst of tantrum, it may be difficult to respond to him with calm, it may appear that it is just too difficult to stop a tantrum without giving into the child’s desire.
What we really we need to know is that satisfying his whims and fancies will not have a positive impact. The solution to the tantrum is building a deep emotional connection with your child and showing him that you are with him when he is going through an emotional chaos and that you will be right there by his side even when is at his worst.
[/et_pb_text][/et_pb_column][/et_pb_row][/et_pb_section]The authors write that responding to a tantrum with compassion does not spoil the child.1What spoils the child is unlimited indulgence into what he desires without any boundries and controls.
You cannot spoil a child by giving him attention, time and love.
A child gets spoiled if the parents create a world around him where he gets his way about anything and everything that he fancies. A spoiled child comes to believe that the world will say “yes” to him all the time and that people around him will serve his whims and desires.
If you are sheltering your child from struggles and overprotecting him from disappointments and difficulties, then you are spoiling the child. But if you are giving them what they really need that is time and attention and not rushing to protect them from disappointments of life then you are slowly building resilience and teaching them critical life lessons.
A child is spoiled when his emotional needs are met by letting him have all that he fancies, this is where he gets a sense of entitlement over things and people.
Whereas when a child’s emotional needs are met through compassion without protecting him from disappointments and walking through those disappointments with them, you are teaching them how to handle themselves when life does not turn out as they had anticipated.
A child is spoiled when parents choose immediate gratification to end the tantrum by giving him stuff.
Parents want the tantrum to end as soon as possible but when children are going through an emotional upheaval, they need us to connect with them and make them feel that we are with them when they are going through a hard time.
This does not mean you remove behavioural boundaries from around your child. Children need to know that we care about what they are going through but there are rules and behavioural boundaries about how they conduct themselves at school, at a store, at home with other caregivers or when meeting other adults.
Responding to a child when he is throwing a tantrum in a public environment does not spoil him but not responding and neglecting his tantrum causes the child to have feelings of insecurity and anxiousness.
We need to give him the confidence that in his moment of crisis his whims and desire will not be met but the emotional turmoil he is going through will be attended to by his parent with love and support.
You are spoiling the child when you give into the melt down with a treat, to quickly end the tantrum. They will not know how to handle the situation when life does not turn out as they had expected.
It is situations like these that spoil the child, and they grow to be unhappy adults because people in the real world do not respond to their disappointment the way their parents do. Shielding a child from troubles and sadness will spoil the child and walking the hard times with our children will make them feel safe and independence.
In the midst of tantrum, it may be difficult to respond to him with calm, it may appear that it is just too difficult to stop a tantrum without giving into the child’s desire.
What we really we need to know is that satisfying his whims and fancies will not have a positive impact. The solution to the tantrum is building a deep emotional connection with your child and showing him that you are with him when he is going through an emotional chaos and that you will be right there by his side even when is at his worst.
[/et_pb_text][/et_pb_column][/et_pb_row][/et_pb_section]But, What about strategic tantrums? And what about spoiling the child?The authors write that responding to a tantrum with compassion does not spoil the child.
1What spoils the child is unlimited indulgence into what he desires without any boundries and controls.
You cannot spoil a child by giving him attention, time and love.
A child gets spoiled if the parents create a world around him where he gets his way about anything and everything that he fancies. A spoiled child comes to believe that the world will say “yes” to him all the time and that people around him will serve his whims and desires.
If you are sheltering your child from struggles and overprotecting him from disappointments and difficulties, then you are spoiling the child. But if you are giving them what they really need that is time and attention and not rushing to protect them from disappointments of life then you are slowly building resilience and teaching them critical life lessons.
A child is spoiled when his emotional needs are met by letting him have all that he fancies, this is where he gets a sense of entitlement over things and people.
Whereas when a child’s emotional needs are met through compassion without protecting him from disappointments and walking through those disappointments with them, you are teaching them how to handle themselves when life does not turn out as they had anticipated.
A child is spoiled when parents choose immediate gratification to end the tantrum by giving him stuff.
Parents want the tantrum to end as soon as possible but when children are going through an emotional upheaval, they need us to connect with them and make them feel that we are with them when they are going through a hard time.
This does not mean you remove behavioural boundaries from around your child. Children need to know that we care about what they are going through but there are rules and behavioural boundaries about how they conduct themselves at school, at a store, at home with other caregivers or when meeting other adults.
Responding to a child when he is throwing a tantrum in a public environment does not spoil him but not responding and neglecting his tantrum causes the child to have feelings of insecurity and anxiousness.
We need to give him the confidence that in his moment of crisis his whims and desire will not be met but the emotional turmoil he is going through will be attended to by his parent with love and support.
You are spoiling the child when you give into the melt down with a treat, to quickly end the tantrum. They will not know how to handle the situation when life does not turn out as they had expected.
It is situations like these that spoil the child, and they grow to be unhappy adults because people in the real world do not respond to their disappointment the way their parents do. Shielding a child from troubles and sadness will spoil the child and walking the hard times with our children will make them feel safe and independence.
In the midst of tantrum, it may be difficult to respond to him with calm, it may appear that it is just too difficult to stop a tantrum without giving into the child’s desire.
What we really we need to know is that satisfying his whims and fancies will not have a positive impact. The solution to the tantrum is building a deep emotional connection with your child and showing him that you are with him when he is going through an emotional chaos and that you will be right there by his side even when is at his worst.
[/et_pb_text][/et_pb_column][/et_pb_row][/et_pb_section]We clearly know which one of these responses will have a long-term positive impact.But, What about strategic tantrums? And what about spoiling the child?
The authors write that responding to a tantrum with compassion does not spoil the child.
1What spoils the child is unlimited indulgence into what he desires without any boundries and controls.
You cannot spoil a child by giving him attention, time and love.
A child gets spoiled if the parents create a world around him where he gets his way about anything and everything that he fancies. A spoiled child comes to believe that the world will say “yes” to him all the time and that people around him will serve his whims and desires.
If you are sheltering your child from struggles and overprotecting him from disappointments and difficulties, then you are spoiling the child. But if you are giving them what they really need that is time and attention and not rushing to protect them from disappointments of life then you are slowly building resilience and teaching them critical life lessons.
A child is spoiled when his emotional needs are met by letting him have all that he fancies, this is where he gets a sense of entitlement over things and people.
Whereas when a child’s emotional needs are met through compassion without protecting him from disappointments and walking through those disappointments with them, you are teaching them how to handle themselves when life does not turn out as they had anticipated.
A child is spoiled when parents choose immediate gratification to end the tantrum by giving him stuff.
Parents want the tantrum to end as soon as possible but when children are going through an emotional upheaval, they need us to connect with them and make them feel that we are with them when they are going through a hard time.
This does not mean you remove behavioural boundaries from around your child. Children need to know that we care about what they are going through but there are rules and behavioural boundaries about how they conduct themselves at school, at a store, at home with other caregivers or when meeting other adults.
Responding to a child when he is throwing a tantrum in a public environment does not spoil him but not responding and neglecting his tantrum causes the child to have feelings of insecurity and anxiousness.
We need to give him the confidence that in his moment of crisis his whims and desire will not be met but the emotional turmoil he is going through will be attended to by his parent with love and support.
You are spoiling the child when you give into the melt down with a treat, to quickly end the tantrum. They will not know how to handle the situation when life does not turn out as they had expected.
It is situations like these that spoil the child, and they grow to be unhappy adults because people in the real world do not respond to their disappointment the way their parents do. Shielding a child from troubles and sadness will spoil the child and walking the hard times with our children will make them feel safe and independence.
In the midst of tantrum, it may be difficult to respond to him with calm, it may appear that it is just too difficult to stop a tantrum without giving into the child’s desire.
What we really we need to know is that satisfying his whims and fancies will not have a positive impact. The solution to the tantrum is building a deep emotional connection with your child and showing him that you are with him when he is going through an emotional chaos and that you will be right there by his side even when is at his worst.
[/et_pb_text][/et_pb_column][/et_pb_row][/et_pb_section]“I am here for you even when you are at your worst. I can see that you are falling apart, and I am here for you and I have got your back.”We clearly know which one of these responses will have a long-term positive impact.
But, What about strategic tantrums? And what about spoiling the child?
The authors write that responding to a tantrum with compassion does not spoil the child.
1What spoils the child is unlimited indulgence into what he desires without any boundries and controls.
You cannot spoil a child by giving him attention, time and love.
A child gets spoiled if the parents create a world around him where he gets his way about anything and everything that he fancies. A spoiled child comes to believe that the world will say “yes” to him all the time and that people around him will serve his whims and desires.
If you are sheltering your child from struggles and overprotecting him from disappointments and difficulties, then you are spoiling the child. But if you are giving them what they really need that is time and attention and not rushing to protect them from disappointments of life then you are slowly building resilience and teaching them critical life lessons.
A child is spoiled when his emotional needs are met by letting him have all that he fancies, this is where he gets a sense of entitlement over things and people.
Whereas when a child’s emotional needs are met through compassion without protecting him from disappointments and walking through those disappointments with them, you are teaching them how to handle themselves when life does not turn out as they had anticipated.
A child is spoiled when parents choose immediate gratification to end the tantrum by giving him stuff.
Parents want the tantrum to end as soon as possible but when children are going through an emotional upheaval, they need us to connect with them and make them feel that we are with them when they are going through a hard time.
This does not mean you remove behavioural boundaries from around your child. Children need to know that we care about what they are going through but there are rules and behavioural boundaries about how they conduct themselves at school, at a store, at home with other caregivers or when meeting other adults.
Responding to a child when he is throwing a tantrum in a public environment does not spoil him but not responding and neglecting his tantrum causes the child to have feelings of insecurity and anxiousness.
We need to give him the confidence that in his moment of crisis his whims and desire will not be met but the emotional turmoil he is going through will be attended to by his parent with love and support.
You are spoiling the child when you give into the melt down with a treat, to quickly end the tantrum. They will not know how to handle the situation when life does not turn out as they had expected.
It is situations like these that spoil the child, and they grow to be unhappy adults because people in the real world do not respond to their disappointment the way their parents do. Shielding a child from troubles and sadness will spoil the child and walking the hard times with our children will make them feel safe and independence.
In the midst of tantrum, it may be difficult to respond to him with calm, it may appear that it is just too difficult to stop a tantrum without giving into the child’s desire.
What we really we need to know is that satisfying his whims and fancies will not have a positive impact. The solution to the tantrum is building a deep emotional connection with your child and showing him that you are with him when he is going through an emotional chaos and that you will be right there by his side even when is at his worst.
[/et_pb_text][/et_pb_column][/et_pb_row][/et_pb_section]Scenario 2“I am here for you even when you are at your worst. I can see that you are falling apart, and I am here for you and I have got your back.”
We clearly know which one of these responses will have a long-term positive impact.
But, What about strategic tantrums? And what about spoiling the child?
The authors write that responding to a tantrum with compassion does not spoil the child.
1What spoils the child is unlimited indulgence into what he desires without any boundries and controls.
You cannot spoil a child by giving him attention, time and love.
A child gets spoiled if the parents create a world around him where he gets his way about anything and everything that he fancies. A spoiled child comes to believe that the world will say “yes” to him all the time and that people around him will serve his whims and desires.
If you are sheltering your child from struggles and overprotecting him from disappointments and difficulties, then you are spoiling the child. But if you are giving them what they really need that is time and attention and not rushing to protect them from disappointments of life then you are slowly building resilience and teaching them critical life lessons.
A child is spoiled when his emotional needs are met by letting him have all that he fancies, this is where he gets a sense of entitlement over things and people.
Whereas when a child’s emotional needs are met through compassion without protecting him from disappointments and walking through those disappointments with them, you are teaching them how to handle themselves when life does not turn out as they had anticipated.
A child is spoiled when parents choose immediate gratification to end the tantrum by giving him stuff.
Parents want the tantrum to end as soon as possible but when children are going through an emotional upheaval, they need us to connect with them and make them feel that we are with them when they are going through a hard time.
This does not mean you remove behavioural boundaries from around your child. Children need to know that we care about what they are going through but there are rules and behavioural boundaries about how they conduct themselves at school, at a store, at home with other caregivers or when meeting other adults.
Responding to a child when he is throwing a tantrum in a public environment does not spoil him but not responding and neglecting his tantrum causes the child to have feelings of insecurity and anxiousness.
We need to give him the confidence that in his moment of crisis his whims and desire will not be met but the emotional turmoil he is going through will be attended to by his parent with love and support.
You are spoiling the child when you give into the melt down with a treat, to quickly end the tantrum. They will not know how to handle the situation when life does not turn out as they had expected.
It is situations like these that spoil the child, and they grow to be unhappy adults because people in the real world do not respond to their disappointment the way their parents do. Shielding a child from troubles and sadness will spoil the child and walking the hard times with our children will make them feel safe and independence.
In the midst of tantrum, it may be difficult to respond to him with calm, it may appear that it is just too difficult to stop a tantrum without giving into the child’s desire.
What we really we need to know is that satisfying his whims and fancies will not have a positive impact. The solution to the tantrum is building a deep emotional connection with your child and showing him that you are with him when he is going through an emotional chaos and that you will be right there by his side even when is at his worst.
[/et_pb_text][/et_pb_column][/et_pb_row][/et_pb_section]“If you are going to be upset and angry, you are on your own. I will love you once you are done throwing your fit. So, hurry up and finish being upset.”Scenario 2
“I am here for you even when you are at your worst. I can see that you are falling apart, and I am here for you and I have got your back.”
We clearly know which one of these responses will have a long-term positive impact.
But, What about strategic tantrums? And what about spoiling the child?
The authors write that responding to a tantrum with compassion does not spoil the child.
1What spoils the child is unlimited indulgence into what he desires without any boundries and controls.
You cannot spoil a child by giving him attention, time and love.
A child gets spoiled if the parents create a world around him where he gets his way about anything and everything that he fancies. A spoiled child comes to believe that the world will say “yes” to him all the time and that people around him will serve his whims and desires.
If you are sheltering your child from struggles and overprotecting him from disappointments and difficulties, then you are spoiling the child. But if you are giving them what they really need that is time and attention and not rushing to protect them from disappointments of life then you are slowly building resilience and teaching them critical life lessons.
A child is spoiled when his emotional needs are met by letting him have all that he fancies, this is where he gets a sense of entitlement over things and people.
Whereas when a child’s emotional needs are met through compassion without protecting him from disappointments and walking through those disappointments with them, you are teaching them how to handle themselves when life does not turn out as they had anticipated.
A child is spoiled when parents choose immediate gratification to end the tantrum by giving him stuff.
Parents want the tantrum to end as soon as possible but when children are going through an emotional upheaval, they need us to connect with them and make them feel that we are with them when they are going through a hard time.
This does not mean you remove behavioural boundaries from around your child. Children need to know that we care about what they are going through but there are rules and behavioural boundaries about how they conduct themselves at school, at a store, at home with other caregivers or when meeting other adults.
Responding to a child when he is throwing a tantrum in a public environment does not spoil him but not responding and neglecting his tantrum causes the child to have feelings of insecurity and anxiousness.
We need to give him the confidence that in his moment of crisis his whims and desire will not be met but the emotional turmoil he is going through will be attended to by his parent with love and support.
You are spoiling the child when you give into the melt down with a treat, to quickly end the tantrum. They will not know how to handle the situation when life does not turn out as they had expected.
It is situations like these that spoil the child, and they grow to be unhappy adults because people in the real world do not respond to their disappointment the way their parents do. Shielding a child from troubles and sadness will spoil the child and walking the hard times with our children will make them feel safe and independence.
In the midst of tantrum, it may be difficult to respond to him with calm, it may appear that it is just too difficult to stop a tantrum without giving into the child’s desire.
What we really we need to know is that satisfying his whims and fancies will not have a positive impact. The solution to the tantrum is building a deep emotional connection with your child and showing him that you are with him when he is going through an emotional chaos and that you will be right there by his side even when is at his worst.
[/et_pb_text][/et_pb_column][/et_pb_row][/et_pb_section]Scenario 1“If you are going to be upset and angry, you are on your own. I will love you once you are done throwing your fit. So, hurry up and finish being upset.”
Scenario 2
“I am here for you even when you are at your worst. I can see that you are falling apart, and I am here for you and I have got your back.”
We clearly know which one of these responses will have a long-term positive impact.
But, What about strategic tantrums? And what about spoiling the child?
The authors write that responding to a tantrum with compassion does not spoil the child.
1What spoils the child is unlimited indulgence into what he desires without any boundries and controls.
You cannot spoil a child by giving him attention, time and love.
A child gets spoiled if the parents create a world around him where he gets his way about anything and everything that he fancies. A spoiled child comes to believe that the world will say “yes” to him all the time and that people around him will serve his whims and desires.
If you are sheltering your child from struggles and overprotecting him from disappointments and difficulties, then you are spoiling the child. But if you are giving them what they really need that is time and attention and not rushing to protect them from disappointments of life then you are slowly building resilience and teaching them critical life lessons.
A child is spoiled when his emotional needs are met by letting him have all that he fancies, this is where he gets a sense of entitlement over things and people.
Whereas when a child’s emotional needs are met through compassion without protecting him from disappointments and walking through those disappointments with them, you are teaching them how to handle themselves when life does not turn out as they had anticipated.
A child is spoiled when parents choose immediate gratification to end the tantrum by giving him stuff.
Parents want the tantrum to end as soon as possible but when children are going through an emotional upheaval, they need us to connect with them and make them feel that we are with them when they are going through a hard time.
This does not mean you remove behavioural boundaries from around your child. Children need to know that we care about what they are going through but there are rules and behavioural boundaries about how they conduct themselves at school, at a store, at home with other caregivers or when meeting other adults.
Responding to a child when he is throwing a tantrum in a public environment does not spoil him but not responding and neglecting his tantrum causes the child to have feelings of insecurity and anxiousness.
We need to give him the confidence that in his moment of crisis his whims and desire will not be met but the emotional turmoil he is going through will be attended to by his parent with love and support.
You are spoiling the child when you give into the melt down with a treat, to quickly end the tantrum. They will not know how to handle the situation when life does not turn out as they had expected.
It is situations like these that spoil the child, and they grow to be unhappy adults because people in the real world do not respond to their disappointment the way their parents do. Shielding a child from troubles and sadness will spoil the child and walking the hard times with our children will make them feel safe and independence.
In the midst of tantrum, it may be difficult to respond to him with calm, it may appear that it is just too difficult to stop a tantrum without giving into the child’s desire.
What we really we need to know is that satisfying his whims and fancies will not have a positive impact. The solution to the tantrum is building a deep emotional connection with your child and showing him that you are with him when he is going through an emotional chaos and that you will be right there by his side even when is at his worst.
[/et_pb_text][/et_pb_column][/et_pb_row][/et_pb_section]The messages we give our children when they are upset impact them in the long run. Scenario 1“If you are going to be upset and angry, you are on your own. I will love you once you are done throwing your fit. So, hurry up and finish being upset.”
Scenario 2
“I am here for you even when you are at your worst. I can see that you are falling apart, and I am here for you and I have got your back.”
We clearly know which one of these responses will have a long-term positive impact.
But, What about strategic tantrums? And what about spoiling the child?
The authors write that responding to a tantrum with compassion does not spoil the child.
1What spoils the child is unlimited indulgence into what he desires without any boundries and controls.
You cannot spoil a child by giving him attention, time and love.
A child gets spoiled if the parents create a world around him where he gets his way about anything and everything that he fancies. A spoiled child comes to believe that the world will say “yes” to him all the time and that people around him will serve his whims and desires.
If you are sheltering your child from struggles and overprotecting him from disappointments and difficulties, then you are spoiling the child. But if you are giving them what they really need that is time and attention and not rushing to protect them from disappointments of life then you are slowly building resilience and teaching them critical life lessons.
A child is spoiled when his emotional needs are met by letting him have all that he fancies, this is where he gets a sense of entitlement over things and people.
Whereas when a child’s emotional needs are met through compassion without protecting him from disappointments and walking through those disappointments with them, you are teaching them how to handle themselves when life does not turn out as they had anticipated.
A child is spoiled when parents choose immediate gratification to end the tantrum by giving him stuff.
Parents want the tantrum to end as soon as possible but when children are going through an emotional upheaval, they need us to connect with them and make them feel that we are with them when they are going through a hard time.
This does not mean you remove behavioural boundaries from around your child. Children need to know that we care about what they are going through but there are rules and behavioural boundaries about how they conduct themselves at school, at a store, at home with other caregivers or when meeting other adults.
Responding to a child when he is throwing a tantrum in a public environment does not spoil him but not responding and neglecting his tantrum causes the child to have feelings of insecurity and anxiousness.
We need to give him the confidence that in his moment of crisis his whims and desire will not be met but the emotional turmoil he is going through will be attended to by his parent with love and support.
You are spoiling the child when you give into the melt down with a treat, to quickly end the tantrum. They will not know how to handle the situation when life does not turn out as they had expected.
It is situations like these that spoil the child, and they grow to be unhappy adults because people in the real world do not respond to their disappointment the way their parents do. Shielding a child from troubles and sadness will spoil the child and walking the hard times with our children will make them feel safe and independence.
In the midst of tantrum, it may be difficult to respond to him with calm, it may appear that it is just too difficult to stop a tantrum without giving into the child’s desire.
What we really we need to know is that satisfying his whims and fancies will not have a positive impact. The solution to the tantrum is building a deep emotional connection with your child and showing him that you are with him when he is going through an emotional chaos and that you will be right there by his side even when is at his worst.
[/et_pb_text][/et_pb_column][/et_pb_row][/et_pb_section]In the book No-Drama Discipline the authors Daniel Siegel and Tina Payne Bryson write thatThe messages we give our children when they are upset impact them in the long run. Scenario 1
“If you are going to be upset and angry, you are on your own. I will love you once you are done throwing your fit. So, hurry up and finish being upset.”
Scenario 2
“I am here for you even when you are at your worst. I can see that you are falling apart, and I am here for you and I have got your back.”
We clearly know which one of these responses will have a long-term positive impact.
But, What about strategic tantrums? And what about spoiling the child?
The authors write that responding to a tantrum with compassion does not spoil the child.
1What spoils the child is unlimited indulgence into what he desires without any boundries and controls.
You cannot spoil a child by giving him attention, time and love.
A child gets spoiled if the parents create a world around him where he gets his way about anything and everything that he fancies. A spoiled child comes to believe that the world will say “yes” to him all the time and that people around him will serve his whims and desires.
If you are sheltering your child from struggles and overprotecting him from disappointments and difficulties, then you are spoiling the child. But if you are giving them what they really need that is time and attention and not rushing to protect them from disappointments of life then you are slowly building resilience and teaching them critical life lessons.
A child is spoiled when his emotional needs are met by letting him have all that he fancies, this is where he gets a sense of entitlement over things and people.
Whereas when a child’s emotional needs are met through compassion without protecting him from disappointments and walking through those disappointments with them, you are teaching them how to handle themselves when life does not turn out as they had anticipated.
A child is spoiled when parents choose immediate gratification to end the tantrum by giving him stuff.
Parents want the tantrum to end as soon as possible but when children are going through an emotional upheaval, they need us to connect with them and make them feel that we are with them when they are going through a hard time.
This does not mean you remove behavioural boundaries from around your child. Children need to know that we care about what they are going through but there are rules and behavioural boundaries about how they conduct themselves at school, at a store, at home with other caregivers or when meeting other adults.
Responding to a child when he is throwing a tantrum in a public environment does not spoil him but not responding and neglecting his tantrum causes the child to have feelings of insecurity and anxiousness.
We need to give him the confidence that in his moment of crisis his whims and desire will not be met but the emotional turmoil he is going through will be attended to by his parent with love and support.
You are spoiling the child when you give into the melt down with a treat, to quickly end the tantrum. They will not know how to handle the situation when life does not turn out as they had expected.
It is situations like these that spoil the child, and they grow to be unhappy adults because people in the real world do not respond to their disappointment the way their parents do. Shielding a child from troubles and sadness will spoil the child and walking the hard times with our children will make them feel safe and independence.
In the midst of tantrum, it may be difficult to respond to him with calm, it may appear that it is just too difficult to stop a tantrum without giving into the child’s desire.
What we really we need to know is that satisfying his whims and fancies will not have a positive impact. The solution to the tantrum is building a deep emotional connection with your child and showing him that you are with him when he is going through an emotional chaos and that you will be right there by his side even when is at his worst.
[/et_pb_text][/et_pb_column][/et_pb_row][/et_pb_section]When we choose to respond to a challenging behaviour with empathy and compassion the child’s brain responds to this with a feeling of security and trust. By doing so you are slowing building him to be independent and resilient. Your compassion is teaching him that there is a better way to react to an emotional chaos than throwing a tantrum.In the book No-Drama Discipline the authors Daniel Siegel and Tina Payne Bryson write that
The messages we give our children when they are upset impact them in the long run. Scenario 1
“If you are going to be upset and angry, you are on your own. I will love you once you are done throwing your fit. So, hurry up and finish being upset.”
Scenario 2
“I am here for you even when you are at your worst. I can see that you are falling apart, and I am here for you and I have got your back.”
We clearly know which one of these responses will have a long-term positive impact.
But, What about strategic tantrums? And what about spoiling the child?
The authors write that responding to a tantrum with compassion does not spoil the child.
1What spoils the child is unlimited indulgence into what he desires without any boundries and controls.
You cannot spoil a child by giving him attention, time and love.
A child gets spoiled if the parents create a world around him where he gets his way about anything and everything that he fancies. A spoiled child comes to believe that the world will say “yes” to him all the time and that people around him will serve his whims and desires.
If you are sheltering your child from struggles and overprotecting him from disappointments and difficulties, then you are spoiling the child. But if you are giving them what they really need that is time and attention and not rushing to protect them from disappointments of life then you are slowly building resilience and teaching them critical life lessons.
A child is spoiled when his emotional needs are met by letting him have all that he fancies, this is where he gets a sense of entitlement over things and people.
Whereas when a child’s emotional needs are met through compassion without protecting him from disappointments and walking through those disappointments with them, you are teaching them how to handle themselves when life does not turn out as they had anticipated.
A child is spoiled when parents choose immediate gratification to end the tantrum by giving him stuff.
Parents want the tantrum to end as soon as possible but when children are going through an emotional upheaval, they need us to connect with them and make them feel that we are with them when they are going through a hard time.
This does not mean you remove behavioural boundaries from around your child. Children need to know that we care about what they are going through but there are rules and behavioural boundaries about how they conduct themselves at school, at a store, at home with other caregivers or when meeting other adults.
Responding to a child when he is throwing a tantrum in a public environment does not spoil him but not responding and neglecting his tantrum causes the child to have feelings of insecurity and anxiousness.
We need to give him the confidence that in his moment of crisis his whims and desire will not be met but the emotional turmoil he is going through will be attended to by his parent with love and support.
You are spoiling the child when you give into the melt down with a treat, to quickly end the tantrum. They will not know how to handle the situation when life does not turn out as they had expected.
It is situations like these that spoil the child, and they grow to be unhappy adults because people in the real world do not respond to their disappointment the way their parents do. Shielding a child from troubles and sadness will spoil the child and walking the hard times with our children will make them feel safe and independence.
In the midst of tantrum, it may be difficult to respond to him with calm, it may appear that it is just too difficult to stop a tantrum without giving into the child’s desire.
What we really we need to know is that satisfying his whims and fancies will not have a positive impact. The solution to the tantrum is building a deep emotional connection with your child and showing him that you are with him when he is going through an emotional chaos and that you will be right there by his side even when is at his worst.
[/et_pb_text][/et_pb_column][/et_pb_row][/et_pb_section]Children are not able to express themselves in a mature sophisticated manner like adults because their brains are complex and are constantly changing. The tantrum is a plea for help when a storm is raging inside themWhen we choose to respond to a challenging behaviour with empathy and compassion the child’s brain responds to this with a feeling of security and trust. By doing so you are slowing building him to be independent and resilient. Your compassion is teaching him that there is a better way to react to an emotional chaos than throwing a tantrum.
In the book No-Drama Discipline the authors Daniel Siegel and Tina Payne Bryson write that
The messages we give our children when they are upset impact them in the long run. Scenario 1
“If you are going to be upset and angry, you are on your own. I will love you once you are done throwing your fit. So, hurry up and finish being upset.”
Scenario 2
“I am here for you even when you are at your worst. I can see that you are falling apart, and I am here for you and I have got your back.”
We clearly know which one of these responses will have a long-term positive impact.
But, What about strategic tantrums? And what about spoiling the child?
The authors write that responding to a tantrum with compassion does not spoil the child.
1What spoils the child is unlimited indulgence into what he desires without any boundries and controls.
You cannot spoil a child by giving him attention, time and love.
A child gets spoiled if the parents create a world around him where he gets his way about anything and everything that he fancies. A spoiled child comes to believe that the world will say “yes” to him all the time and that people around him will serve his whims and desires.
If you are sheltering your child from struggles and overprotecting him from disappointments and difficulties, then you are spoiling the child. But if you are giving them what they really need that is time and attention and not rushing to protect them from disappointments of life then you are slowly building resilience and teaching them critical life lessons.
A child is spoiled when his emotional needs are met by letting him have all that he fancies, this is where he gets a sense of entitlement over things and people.
Whereas when a child’s emotional needs are met through compassion without protecting him from disappointments and walking through those disappointments with them, you are teaching them how to handle themselves when life does not turn out as they had anticipated.
A child is spoiled when parents choose immediate gratification to end the tantrum by giving him stuff.
Parents want the tantrum to end as soon as possible but when children are going through an emotional upheaval, they need us to connect with them and make them feel that we are with them when they are going through a hard time.
This does not mean you remove behavioural boundaries from around your child. Children need to know that we care about what they are going through but there are rules and behavioural boundaries about how they conduct themselves at school, at a store, at home with other caregivers or when meeting other adults.
Responding to a child when he is throwing a tantrum in a public environment does not spoil him but not responding and neglecting his tantrum causes the child to have feelings of insecurity and anxiousness.
We need to give him the confidence that in his moment of crisis his whims and desire will not be met but the emotional turmoil he is going through will be attended to by his parent with love and support.
You are spoiling the child when you give into the melt down with a treat, to quickly end the tantrum. They will not know how to handle the situation when life does not turn out as they had expected.
It is situations like these that spoil the child, and they grow to be unhappy adults because people in the real world do not respond to their disappointment the way their parents do. Shielding a child from troubles and sadness will spoil the child and walking the hard times with our children will make them feel safe and independence.
In the midst of tantrum, it may be difficult to respond to him with calm, it may appear that it is just too difficult to stop a tantrum without giving into the child’s desire.
What we really we need to know is that satisfying his whims and fancies will not have a positive impact. The solution to the tantrum is building a deep emotional connection with your child and showing him that you are with him when he is going through an emotional chaos and that you will be right there by his side even when is at his worst.
[/et_pb_text][/et_pb_column][/et_pb_row][/et_pb_section]Whether we choose to guide them with love or criticise and shame them can influence their sense of self and our connection with them.Children are not able to express themselves in a mature sophisticated manner like adults because their brains are complex and are constantly changing. The tantrum is a plea for help when a storm is raging inside them
When we choose to respond to a challenging behaviour with empathy and compassion the child’s brain responds to this with a feeling of security and trust. By doing so you are slowing building him to be independent and resilient. Your compassion is teaching him that there is a better way to react to an emotional chaos than throwing a tantrum.
In the book No-Drama Discipline the authors Daniel Siegel and Tina Payne Bryson write that
The messages we give our children when they are upset impact them in the long run. Scenario 1
“If you are going to be upset and angry, you are on your own. I will love you once you are done throwing your fit. So, hurry up and finish being upset.”
Scenario 2
“I am here for you even when you are at your worst. I can see that you are falling apart, and I am here for you and I have got your back.”
We clearly know which one of these responses will have a long-term positive impact.
But, What about strategic tantrums? And what about spoiling the child?
The authors write that responding to a tantrum with compassion does not spoil the child.
1What spoils the child is unlimited indulgence into what he desires without any boundries and controls.
You cannot spoil a child by giving him attention, time and love.
A child gets spoiled if the parents create a world around him where he gets his way about anything and everything that he fancies. A spoiled child comes to believe that the world will say “yes” to him all the time and that people around him will serve his whims and desires.
If you are sheltering your child from struggles and overprotecting him from disappointments and difficulties, then you are spoiling the child. But if you are giving them what they really need that is time and attention and not rushing to protect them from disappointments of life then you are slowly building resilience and teaching them critical life lessons.
A child is spoiled when his emotional needs are met by letting him have all that he fancies, this is where he gets a sense of entitlement over things and people.
Whereas when a child’s emotional needs are met through compassion without protecting him from disappointments and walking through those disappointments with them, you are teaching them how to handle themselves when life does not turn out as they had anticipated.
A child is spoiled when parents choose immediate gratification to end the tantrum by giving him stuff.
Parents want the tantrum to end as soon as possible but when children are going through an emotional upheaval, they need us to connect with them and make them feel that we are with them when they are going through a hard time.
This does not mean you remove behavioural boundaries from around your child. Children need to know that we care about what they are going through but there are rules and behavioural boundaries about how they conduct themselves at school, at a store, at home with other caregivers or when meeting other adults.
Responding to a child when he is throwing a tantrum in a public environment does not spoil him but not responding and neglecting his tantrum causes the child to have feelings of insecurity and anxiousness.
We need to give him the confidence that in his moment of crisis his whims and desire will not be met but the emotional turmoil he is going through will be attended to by his parent with love and support.
You are spoiling the child when you give into the melt down with a treat, to quickly end the tantrum. They will not know how to handle the situation when life does not turn out as they had expected.
It is situations like these that spoil the child, and they grow to be unhappy adults because people in the real world do not respond to their disappointment the way their parents do. Shielding a child from troubles and sadness will spoil the child and walking the hard times with our children will make them feel safe and independence.
In the midst of tantrum, it may be difficult to respond to him with calm, it may appear that it is just too difficult to stop a tantrum without giving into the child’s desire.
What we really we need to know is that satisfying his whims and fancies will not have a positive impact. The solution to the tantrum is building a deep emotional connection with your child and showing him that you are with him when he is going through an emotional chaos and that you will be right there by his side even when is at his worst.
[/et_pb_text][/et_pb_column][/et_pb_row][/et_pb_section]When children are misbehaving and are out of control; it can be the most challenging parenting moment.Whether we choose to guide them with love or criticise and shame them can influence their sense of self and our connection with them.
Children are not able to express themselves in a mature sophisticated manner like adults because their brains are complex and are constantly changing. The tantrum is a plea for help when a storm is raging inside them
When we choose to respond to a challenging behaviour with empathy and compassion the child’s brain responds to this with a feeling of security and trust. By doing so you are slowing building him to be independent and resilient. Your compassion is teaching him that there is a better way to react to an emotional chaos than throwing a tantrum.
In the book No-Drama Discipline the authors Daniel Siegel and Tina Payne Bryson write that
The messages we give our children when they are upset impact them in the long run. Scenario 1
“If you are going to be upset and angry, you are on your own. I will love you once you are done throwing your fit. So, hurry up and finish being upset.”
Scenario 2
“I am here for you even when you are at your worst. I can see that you are falling apart, and I am here for you and I have got your back.”
We clearly know which one of these responses will have a long-term positive impact.
But, What about strategic tantrums? And what about spoiling the child?
The authors write that responding to a tantrum with compassion does not spoil the child.
1What spoils the child is unlimited indulgence into what he desires without any boundries and controls.
You cannot spoil a child by giving him attention, time and love.
A child gets spoiled if the parents create a world around him where he gets his way about anything and everything that he fancies. A spoiled child comes to believe that the world will say “yes” to him all the time and that people around him will serve his whims and desires.
If you are sheltering your child from struggles and overprotecting him from disappointments and difficulties, then you are spoiling the child. But if you are giving them what they really need that is time and attention and not rushing to protect them from disappointments of life then you are slowly building resilience and teaching them critical life lessons.
A child is spoiled when his emotional needs are met by letting him have all that he fancies, this is where he gets a sense of entitlement over things and people.
Whereas when a child’s emotional needs are met through compassion without protecting him from disappointments and walking through those disappointments with them, you are teaching them how to handle themselves when life does not turn out as they had anticipated.
A child is spoiled when parents choose immediate gratification to end the tantrum by giving him stuff.
Parents want the tantrum to end as soon as possible but when children are going through an emotional upheaval, they need us to connect with them and make them feel that we are with them when they are going through a hard time.
This does not mean you remove behavioural boundaries from around your child. Children need to know that we care about what they are going through but there are rules and behavioural boundaries about how they conduct themselves at school, at a store, at home with other caregivers or when meeting other adults.
Responding to a child when he is throwing a tantrum in a public environment does not spoil him but not responding and neglecting his tantrum causes the child to have feelings of insecurity and anxiousness.
We need to give him the confidence that in his moment of crisis his whims and desire will not be met but the emotional turmoil he is going through will be attended to by his parent with love and support.
You are spoiling the child when you give into the melt down with a treat, to quickly end the tantrum. They will not know how to handle the situation when life does not turn out as they had expected.
It is situations like these that spoil the child, and they grow to be unhappy adults because people in the real world do not respond to their disappointment the way their parents do. Shielding a child from troubles and sadness will spoil the child and walking the hard times with our children will make them feel safe and independence.
In the midst of tantrum, it may be difficult to respond to him with calm, it may appear that it is just too difficult to stop a tantrum without giving into the child’s desire.
What we really we need to know is that satisfying his whims and fancies will not have a positive impact. The solution to the tantrum is building a deep emotional connection with your child and showing him that you are with him when he is going through an emotional chaos and that you will be right there by his side even when is at his worst.
[/et_pb_text][/et_pb_column][/et_pb_row][/et_pb_section]How we respond to our children when we are not happy with their choices, impacts our relationship with them and even how they think of themselves.When children are misbehaving and are out of control; it can be the most challenging parenting moment.
Whether we choose to guide them with love or criticise and shame them can influence their sense of self and our connection with them.
Children are not able to express themselves in a mature sophisticated manner like adults because their brains are complex and are constantly changing. The tantrum is a plea for help when a storm is raging inside them
When we choose to respond to a challenging behaviour with empathy and compassion the child’s brain responds to this with a feeling of security and trust. By doing so you are slowing building him to be independent and resilient. Your compassion is teaching him that there is a better way to react to an emotional chaos than throwing a tantrum.
In the book No-Drama Discipline the authors Daniel Siegel and Tina Payne Bryson write that
The messages we give our children when they are upset impact them in the long run. Scenario 1
“If you are going to be upset and angry, you are on your own. I will love you once you are done throwing your fit. So, hurry up and finish being upset.”
Scenario 2
“I am here for you even when you are at your worst. I can see that you are falling apart, and I am here for you and I have got your back.”
We clearly know which one of these responses will have a long-term positive impact.
But, What about strategic tantrums? And what about spoiling the child?
The authors write that responding to a tantrum with compassion does not spoil the child.
1What spoils the child is unlimited indulgence into what he desires without any boundries and controls.
You cannot spoil a child by giving him attention, time and love.
A child gets spoiled if the parents create a world around him where he gets his way about anything and everything that he fancies. A spoiled child comes to believe that the world will say “yes” to him all the time and that people around him will serve his whims and desires.
If you are sheltering your child from struggles and overprotecting him from disappointments and difficulties, then you are spoiling the child. But if you are giving them what they really need that is time and attention and not rushing to protect them from disappointments of life then you are slowly building resilience and teaching them critical life lessons.
A child is spoiled when his emotional needs are met by letting him have all that he fancies, this is where he gets a sense of entitlement over things and people.
Whereas when a child’s emotional needs are met through compassion without protecting him from disappointments and walking through those disappointments with them, you are teaching them how to handle themselves when life does not turn out as they had anticipated.
A child is spoiled when parents choose immediate gratification to end the tantrum by giving him stuff.
Parents want the tantrum to end as soon as possible but when children are going through an emotional upheaval, they need us to connect with them and make them feel that we are with them when they are going through a hard time.
This does not mean you remove behavioural boundaries from around your child. Children need to know that we care about what they are going through but there are rules and behavioural boundaries about how they conduct themselves at school, at a store, at home with other caregivers or when meeting other adults.
Responding to a child when he is throwing a tantrum in a public environment does not spoil him but not responding and neglecting his tantrum causes the child to have feelings of insecurity and anxiousness.
We need to give him the confidence that in his moment of crisis his whims and desire will not be met but the emotional turmoil he is going through will be attended to by his parent with love and support.
You are spoiling the child when you give into the melt down with a treat, to quickly end the tantrum. They will not know how to handle the situation when life does not turn out as they had expected.
It is situations like these that spoil the child, and they grow to be unhappy adults because people in the real world do not respond to their disappointment the way their parents do. Shielding a child from troubles and sadness will spoil the child and walking the hard times with our children will make them feel safe and independence.
In the midst of tantrum, it may be difficult to respond to him with calm, it may appear that it is just too difficult to stop a tantrum without giving into the child’s desire.
What we really we need to know is that satisfying his whims and fancies will not have a positive impact. The solution to the tantrum is building a deep emotional connection with your child and showing him that you are with him when he is going through an emotional chaos and that you will be right there by his side even when is at his worst.
[/et_pb_text][/et_pb_column][/et_pb_row][/et_pb_section]and when we have contradicting reactions?These moments are the real test.
How we respond to our children when we are not happy with their choices, impacts our relationship with them and even how they think of themselves.
When children are misbehaving and are out of control; it can be the most challenging parenting moment.
Whether we choose to guide them with love or criticise and shame them can influence their sense of self and our connection with them.
Children are not able to express themselves in a mature sophisticated manner like adults because their brains are complex and are constantly changing. The tantrum is a plea for help when a storm is raging inside them
When we choose to respond to a challenging behaviour with empathy and compassion the child’s brain responds to this with a feeling of security and trust. By doing so you are slowing building him to be independent and resilient. Your compassion is teaching him that there is a better way to react to an emotional chaos than throwing a tantrum.
In the book No-Drama Discipline the authors Daniel Siegel and Tina Payne Bryson write that
The messages we give our children when they are upset impact them in the long run. Scenario 1
“If you are going to be upset and angry, you are on your own. I will love you once you are done throwing your fit. So, hurry up and finish being upset.”
Scenario 2
“I am here for you even when you are at your worst. I can see that you are falling apart, and I am here for you and I have got your back.”
We clearly know which one of these responses will have a long-term positive impact.
But, What about strategic tantrums? And what about spoiling the child?
The authors write that responding to a tantrum with compassion does not spoil the child.
1What spoils the child is unlimited indulgence into what he desires without any boundries and controls.
You cannot spoil a child by giving him attention, time and love.
A child gets spoiled if the parents create a world around him where he gets his way about anything and everything that he fancies. A spoiled child comes to believe that the world will say “yes” to him all the time and that people around him will serve his whims and desires.
If you are sheltering your child from struggles and overprotecting him from disappointments and difficulties, then you are spoiling the child. But if you are giving them what they really need that is time and attention and not rushing to protect them from disappointments of life then you are slowly building resilience and teaching them critical life lessons.
A child is spoiled when his emotional needs are met by letting him have all that he fancies, this is where he gets a sense of entitlement over things and people.
Whereas when a child’s emotional needs are met through compassion without protecting him from disappointments and walking through those disappointments with them, you are teaching them how to handle themselves when life does not turn out as they had anticipated.
A child is spoiled when parents choose immediate gratification to end the tantrum by giving him stuff.
Parents want the tantrum to end as soon as possible but when children are going through an emotional upheaval, they need us to connect with them and make them feel that we are with them when they are going through a hard time.
This does not mean you remove behavioural boundaries from around your child. Children need to know that we care about what they are going through but there are rules and behavioural boundaries about how they conduct themselves at school, at a store, at home with other caregivers or when meeting other adults.
Responding to a child when he is throwing a tantrum in a public environment does not spoil him but not responding and neglecting his tantrum causes the child to have feelings of insecurity and anxiousness.
We need to give him the confidence that in his moment of crisis his whims and desire will not be met but the emotional turmoil he is going through will be attended to by his parent with love and support.
You are spoiling the child when you give into the melt down with a treat, to quickly end the tantrum. They will not know how to handle the situation when life does not turn out as they had expected.
It is situations like these that spoil the child, and they grow to be unhappy adults because people in the real world do not respond to their disappointment the way their parents do. Shielding a child from troubles and sadness will spoil the child and walking the hard times with our children will make them feel safe and independence.
In the midst of tantrum, it may be difficult to respond to him with calm, it may appear that it is just too difficult to stop a tantrum without giving into the child’s desire.
What we really we need to know is that satisfying his whims and fancies will not have a positive impact. The solution to the tantrum is building a deep emotional connection with your child and showing him that you are with him when he is going through an emotional chaos and that you will be right there by his side even when is at his worst.
[/et_pb_text][/et_pb_column][/et_pb_row][/et_pb_section]what happens when a conflict arises?and when we have contradicting reactions?
These moments are the real test.
How we respond to our children when we are not happy with their choices, impacts our relationship with them and even how they think of themselves.
When children are misbehaving and are out of control; it can be the most challenging parenting moment.
Whether we choose to guide them with love or criticise and shame them can influence their sense of self and our connection with them.
Children are not able to express themselves in a mature sophisticated manner like adults because their brains are complex and are constantly changing. The tantrum is a plea for help when a storm is raging inside them
When we choose to respond to a challenging behaviour with empathy and compassion the child’s brain responds to this with a feeling of security and trust. By doing so you are slowing building him to be independent and resilient. Your compassion is teaching him that there is a better way to react to an emotional chaos than throwing a tantrum.
In the book No-Drama Discipline the authors Daniel Siegel and Tina Payne Bryson write that
The messages we give our children when they are upset impact them in the long run. Scenario 1
“If you are going to be upset and angry, you are on your own. I will love you once you are done throwing your fit. So, hurry up and finish being upset.”
Scenario 2
“I am here for you even when you are at your worst. I can see that you are falling apart, and I am here for you and I have got your back.”
We clearly know which one of these responses will have a long-term positive impact.
But, What about strategic tantrums? And what about spoiling the child?
The authors write that responding to a tantrum with compassion does not spoil the child.
1What spoils the child is unlimited indulgence into what he desires without any boundries and controls.
You cannot spoil a child by giving him attention, time and love.
A child gets spoiled if the parents create a world around him where he gets his way about anything and everything that he fancies. A spoiled child comes to believe that the world will say “yes” to him all the time and that people around him will serve his whims and desires.
If you are sheltering your child from struggles and overprotecting him from disappointments and difficulties, then you are spoiling the child. But if you are giving them what they really need that is time and attention and not rushing to protect them from disappointments of life then you are slowly building resilience and teaching them critical life lessons.
A child is spoiled when his emotional needs are met by letting him have all that he fancies, this is where he gets a sense of entitlement over things and people.
Whereas when a child’s emotional needs are met through compassion without protecting him from disappointments and walking through those disappointments with them, you are teaching them how to handle themselves when life does not turn out as they had anticipated.
A child is spoiled when parents choose immediate gratification to end the tantrum by giving him stuff.
Parents want the tantrum to end as soon as possible but when children are going through an emotional upheaval, they need us to connect with them and make them feel that we are with them when they are going through a hard time.
This does not mean you remove behavioural boundaries from around your child. Children need to know that we care about what they are going through but there are rules and behavioural boundaries about how they conduct themselves at school, at a store, at home with other caregivers or when meeting other adults.
Responding to a child when he is throwing a tantrum in a public environment does not spoil him but not responding and neglecting his tantrum causes the child to have feelings of insecurity and anxiousness.
We need to give him the confidence that in his moment of crisis his whims and desire will not be met but the emotional turmoil he is going through will be attended to by his parent with love and support.
You are spoiling the child when you give into the melt down with a treat, to quickly end the tantrum. They will not know how to handle the situation when life does not turn out as they had expected.
It is situations like these that spoil the child, and they grow to be unhappy adults because people in the real world do not respond to their disappointment the way their parents do. Shielding a child from troubles and sadness will spoil the child and walking the hard times with our children will make them feel safe and independence.
In the midst of tantrum, it may be difficult to respond to him with calm, it may appear that it is just too difficult to stop a tantrum without giving into the child’s desire.
What we really we need to know is that satisfying his whims and fancies will not have a positive impact. The solution to the tantrum is building a deep emotional connection with your child and showing him that you are with him when he is going through an emotional chaos and that you will be right there by his side even when is at his worst.
[/et_pb_text][/et_pb_column][/et_pb_row][/et_pb_section]Our kids know that we love them but,what happens when a conflict arises?
and when we have contradicting reactions?
These moments are the real test.
How we respond to our children when we are not happy with their choices, impacts our relationship with them and even how they think of themselves.
When children are misbehaving and are out of control; it can be the most challenging parenting moment.
Whether we choose to guide them with love or criticise and shame them can influence their sense of self and our connection with them.
Children are not able to express themselves in a mature sophisticated manner like adults because their brains are complex and are constantly changing. The tantrum is a plea for help when a storm is raging inside them
When we choose to respond to a challenging behaviour with empathy and compassion the child’s brain responds to this with a feeling of security and trust. By doing so you are slowing building him to be independent and resilient. Your compassion is teaching him that there is a better way to react to an emotional chaos than throwing a tantrum.
In the book No-Drama Discipline the authors Daniel Siegel and Tina Payne Bryson write that
The messages we give our children when they are upset impact them in the long run. Scenario 1
“If you are going to be upset and angry, you are on your own. I will love you once you are done throwing your fit. So, hurry up and finish being upset.”
Scenario 2
“I am here for you even when you are at your worst. I can see that you are falling apart, and I am here for you and I have got your back.”
We clearly know which one of these responses will have a long-term positive impact.
But, What about strategic tantrums? And what about spoiling the child?
The authors write that responding to a tantrum with compassion does not spoil the child.
1What spoils the child is unlimited indulgence into what he desires without any boundries and controls.
You cannot spoil a child by giving him attention, time and love.
A child gets spoiled if the parents create a world around him where he gets his way about anything and everything that he fancies. A spoiled child comes to believe that the world will say “yes” to him all the time and that people around him will serve his whims and desires.
If you are sheltering your child from struggles and overprotecting him from disappointments and difficulties, then you are spoiling the child. But if you are giving them what they really need that is time and attention and not rushing to protect them from disappointments of life then you are slowly building resilience and teaching them critical life lessons.
A child is spoiled when his emotional needs are met by letting him have all that he fancies, this is where he gets a sense of entitlement over things and people.
Whereas when a child’s emotional needs are met through compassion without protecting him from disappointments and walking through those disappointments with them, you are teaching them how to handle themselves when life does not turn out as they had anticipated.
A child is spoiled when parents choose immediate gratification to end the tantrum by giving him stuff.
Parents want the tantrum to end as soon as possible but when children are going through an emotional upheaval, they need us to connect with them and make them feel that we are with them when they are going through a hard time.
This does not mean you remove behavioural boundaries from around your child. Children need to know that we care about what they are going through but there are rules and behavioural boundaries about how they conduct themselves at school, at a store, at home with other caregivers or when meeting other adults.
Responding to a child when he is throwing a tantrum in a public environment does not spoil him but not responding and neglecting his tantrum causes the child to have feelings of insecurity and anxiousness.
We need to give him the confidence that in his moment of crisis his whims and desire will not be met but the emotional turmoil he is going through will be attended to by his parent with love and support.
You are spoiling the child when you give into the melt down with a treat, to quickly end the tantrum. They will not know how to handle the situation when life does not turn out as they had expected.
It is situations like these that spoil the child, and they grow to be unhappy adults because people in the real world do not respond to their disappointment the way their parents do. Shielding a child from troubles and sadness will spoil the child and walking the hard times with our children will make them feel safe and independence.
In the midst of tantrum, it may be difficult to respond to him with calm, it may appear that it is just too difficult to stop a tantrum without giving into the child’s desire.
What we really we need to know is that satisfying his whims and fancies will not have a positive impact. The solution to the tantrum is building a deep emotional connection with your child and showing him that you are with him when he is going through an emotional chaos and that you will be right there by his side even when is at his worst.
[/et_pb_text][/et_pb_column][/et_pb_row][/et_pb_section]Moments of conflict with children can make or break our relationships with them.Our kids know that we love them but,
what happens when a conflict arises?
and when we have contradicting reactions?
These moments are the real test.
How we respond to our children when we are not happy with their choices, impacts our relationship with them and even how they think of themselves.
When children are misbehaving and are out of control; it can be the most challenging parenting moment.
Whether we choose to guide them with love or criticise and shame them can influence their sense of self and our connection with them.
Children are not able to express themselves in a mature sophisticated manner like adults because their brains are complex and are constantly changing. The tantrum is a plea for help when a storm is raging inside them
When we choose to respond to a challenging behaviour with empathy and compassion the child’s brain responds to this with a feeling of security and trust. By doing so you are slowing building him to be independent and resilient. Your compassion is teaching him that there is a better way to react to an emotional chaos than throwing a tantrum.
In the book No-Drama Discipline the authors Daniel Siegel and Tina Payne Bryson write that
The messages we give our children when they are upset impact them in the long run. Scenario 1
“If you are going to be upset and angry, you are on your own. I will love you once you are done throwing your fit. So, hurry up and finish being upset.”
Scenario 2
“I am here for you even when you are at your worst. I can see that you are falling apart, and I am here for you and I have got your back.”
We clearly know which one of these responses will have a long-term positive impact.
But, What about strategic tantrums? And what about spoiling the child?
The authors write that responding to a tantrum with compassion does not spoil the child.
1What spoils the child is unlimited indulgence into what he desires without any boundries and controls.
You cannot spoil a child by giving him attention, time and love.
A child gets spoiled if the parents create a world around him where he gets his way about anything and everything that he fancies. A spoiled child comes to believe that the world will say “yes” to him all the time and that people around him will serve his whims and desires.
If you are sheltering your child from struggles and overprotecting him from disappointments and difficulties, then you are spoiling the child. But if you are giving them what they really need that is time and attention and not rushing to protect them from disappointments of life then you are slowly building resilience and teaching them critical life lessons.
A child is spoiled when his emotional needs are met by letting him have all that he fancies, this is where he gets a sense of entitlement over things and people.
Whereas when a child’s emotional needs are met through compassion without protecting him from disappointments and walking through those disappointments with them, you are teaching them how to handle themselves when life does not turn out as they had anticipated.
A child is spoiled when parents choose immediate gratification to end the tantrum by giving him stuff.
Parents want the tantrum to end as soon as possible but when children are going through an emotional upheaval, they need us to connect with them and make them feel that we are with them when they are going through a hard time.
This does not mean you remove behavioural boundaries from around your child. Children need to know that we care about what they are going through but there are rules and behavioural boundaries about how they conduct themselves at school, at a store, at home with other caregivers or when meeting other adults.
Responding to a child when he is throwing a tantrum in a public environment does not spoil him but not responding and neglecting his tantrum causes the child to have feelings of insecurity and anxiousness.
We need to give him the confidence that in his moment of crisis his whims and desire will not be met but the emotional turmoil he is going through will be attended to by his parent with love and support.
You are spoiling the child when you give into the melt down with a treat, to quickly end the tantrum. They will not know how to handle the situation when life does not turn out as they had expected.
It is situations like these that spoil the child, and they grow to be unhappy adults because people in the real world do not respond to their disappointment the way their parents do. Shielding a child from troubles and sadness will spoil the child and walking the hard times with our children will make them feel safe and independence.
In the midst of tantrum, it may be difficult to respond to him with calm, it may appear that it is just too difficult to stop a tantrum without giving into the child’s desire.
What we really we need to know is that satisfying his whims and fancies will not have a positive impact. The solution to the tantrum is building a deep emotional connection with your child and showing him that you are with him when he is going through an emotional chaos and that you will be right there by his side even when is at his worst.
[/et_pb_text][/et_pb_column][/et_pb_row][/et_pb_section]Will giving in to tantrums spoil your child?Moments of conflict with children can make or break our relationships with them.
Our kids know that we love them but,
what happens when a conflict arises?
and when we have contradicting reactions?
These moments are the real test.
How we respond to our children when we are not happy with their choices, impacts our relationship with them and even how they think of themselves.
When children are misbehaving and are out of control; it can be the most challenging parenting moment.
Whether we choose to guide them with love or criticise and shame them can influence their sense of self and our connection with them.
Children are not able to express themselves in a mature sophisticated manner like adults because their brains are complex and are constantly changing. The tantrum is a plea for help when a storm is raging inside them
When we choose to respond to a challenging behaviour with empathy and compassion the child’s brain responds to this with a feeling of security and trust. By doing so you are slowing building him to be independent and resilient. Your compassion is teaching him that there is a better way to react to an emotional chaos than throwing a tantrum.
In the book No-Drama Discipline the authors Daniel Siegel and Tina Payne Bryson write that
The messages we give our children when they are upset impact them in the long run. Scenario 1
“If you are going to be upset and angry, you are on your own. I will love you once you are done throwing your fit. So, hurry up and finish being upset.”
Scenario 2
“I am here for you even when you are at your worst. I can see that you are falling apart, and I am here for you and I have got your back.”
We clearly know which one of these responses will have a long-term positive impact.
But, What about strategic tantrums? And what about spoiling the child?
The authors write that responding to a tantrum with compassion does not spoil the child.
1What spoils the child is unlimited indulgence into what he desires without any boundries and controls.
You cannot spoil a child by giving him attention, time and love.
A child gets spoiled if the parents create a world around him where he gets his way about anything and everything that he fancies. A spoiled child comes to believe that the world will say “yes” to him all the time and that people around him will serve his whims and desires.
If you are sheltering your child from struggles and overprotecting him from disappointments and difficulties, then you are spoiling the child. But if you are giving them what they really need that is time and attention and not rushing to protect them from disappointments of life then you are slowly building resilience and teaching them critical life lessons.
A child is spoiled when his emotional needs are met by letting him have all that he fancies, this is where he gets a sense of entitlement over things and people.
Whereas when a child’s emotional needs are met through compassion without protecting him from disappointments and walking through those disappointments with them, you are teaching them how to handle themselves when life does not turn out as they had anticipated.
A child is spoiled when parents choose immediate gratification to end the tantrum by giving him stuff.
Parents want the tantrum to end as soon as possible but when children are going through an emotional upheaval, they need us to connect with them and make them feel that we are with them when they are going through a hard time.
This does not mean you remove behavioural boundaries from around your child. Children need to know that we care about what they are going through but there are rules and behavioural boundaries about how they conduct themselves at school, at a store, at home with other caregivers or when meeting other adults.
Responding to a child when he is throwing a tantrum in a public environment does not spoil him but not responding and neglecting his tantrum causes the child to have feelings of insecurity and anxiousness.
We need to give him the confidence that in his moment of crisis his whims and desire will not be met but the emotional turmoil he is going through will be attended to by his parent with love and support.
You are spoiling the child when you give into the melt down with a treat, to quickly end the tantrum. They will not know how to handle the situation when life does not turn out as they had expected.
It is situations like these that spoil the child, and they grow to be unhappy adults because people in the real world do not respond to their disappointment the way their parents do. Shielding a child from troubles and sadness will spoil the child and walking the hard times with our children will make them feel safe and independence.
In the midst of tantrum, it may be difficult to respond to him with calm, it may appear that it is just too difficult to stop a tantrum without giving into the child’s desire.
What we really we need to know is that satisfying his whims and fancies will not have a positive impact. The solution to the tantrum is building a deep emotional connection with your child and showing him that you are with him when he is going through an emotional chaos and that you will be right there by his side even when is at his worst.
[/et_pb_text][/et_pb_column][/et_pb_row][/et_pb_section]Will giving in to tantrums spoil your child?
Moments of conflict with children can make or break our relationships with them.
Our kids know that we love them but,
what happens when a conflict arises?
and when we have contradicting reactions?
These moments are the real test.
How we respond to our children when we are not happy with their choices, impacts our relationship with them and even how they think of themselves.
When children are misbehaving and are out of control; it can be the most challenging parenting moment.
Whether we choose to guide them with love or criticise and shame them can influence their sense of self and our connection with them.
Children are not able to express themselves in a mature sophisticated manner like adults because their brains are complex and are constantly changing. The tantrum is a plea for help when a storm is raging inside them
When we choose to respond to a challenging behaviour with empathy and compassion the child’s brain responds to this with a feeling of security and trust. By doing so you are slowing building him to be independent and resilient. Your compassion is teaching him that there is a better way to react to an emotional chaos than throwing a tantrum.
In the book No-Drama Discipline the authors Daniel Siegel and Tina Payne Bryson write that
The messages we give our children when they are upset impact them in the long run. Scenario 1
“If you are going to be upset and angry, you are on your own. I will love you once you are done throwing your fit. So, hurry up and finish being upset.”
Scenario 2
“I am here for you even when you are at your worst. I can see that you are falling apart, and I am here for you and I have got your back.”
We clearly know which one of these responses will have a long-term positive impact.
But, What about strategic tantrums? And what about spoiling the child?
The authors write that responding to a tantrum with compassion does not spoil the child.
1What spoils the child is unlimited indulgence into what he desires without any boundries and controls.
You cannot spoil a child by giving him attention, time and love.
A child gets spoiled if the parents create a world around him where he gets his way about anything and everything that he fancies. A spoiled child comes to believe that the world will say “yes” to him all the time and that people around him will serve his whims and desires.
If you are sheltering your child from struggles and overprotecting him from disappointments and difficulties, then you are spoiling the child. But if you are giving them what they really need that is time and attention and not rushing to protect them from disappointments of life then you are slowly building resilience and teaching them critical life lessons.
A child is spoiled when his emotional needs are met by letting him have all that he fancies, this is where he gets a sense of entitlement over things and people.
Whereas when a child’s emotional needs are met through compassion without protecting him from disappointments and walking through those disappointments with them, you are teaching them how to handle themselves when life does not turn out as they had anticipated.
A child is spoiled when parents choose immediate gratification to end the tantrum by giving him stuff.
Parents want the tantrum to end as soon as possible but when children are going through an emotional upheaval, they need us to connect with them and make them feel that we are with them when they are going through a hard time.
This does not mean you remove behavioural boundaries from around your child. Children need to know that we care about what they are going through but there are rules and behavioural boundaries about how they conduct themselves at school, at a store, at home with other caregivers or when meeting other adults.
Responding to a child when he is throwing a tantrum in a public environment does not spoil him but not responding and neglecting his tantrum causes the child to have feelings of insecurity and anxiousness.
We need to give him the confidence that in his moment of crisis his whims and desire will not be met but the emotional turmoil he is going through will be attended to by his parent with love and support.
You are spoiling the child when you give into the melt down with a treat, to quickly end the tantrum. They will not know how to handle the situation when life does not turn out as they had expected.
It is situations like these that spoil the child, and they grow to be unhappy adults because people in the real world do not respond to their disappointment the way their parents do. Shielding a child from troubles and sadness will spoil the child and walking the hard times with our children will make them feel safe and independence.
In the midst of tantrum, it may be difficult to respond to him with calm, it may appear that it is just too difficult to stop a tantrum without giving into the child’s desire.
What we really we need to know is that satisfying his whims and fancies will not have a positive impact. The solution to the tantrum is building a deep emotional connection with your child and showing him that you are with him when he is going through an emotional chaos and that you will be right there by his side even when is at his worst.